As a manufacturer of contraceptives for several decades, I have a few things to say about sex. I think most people would agree that a great sex life is a win-win game. It is not just about one partner. While I know it is problem atic to compare gender equality with sex, I do think the best sex can not happen without it. Regardless of role play or fantasies, sex which is bad for one is ultimately bad for both partner. Good sex not only makes you feel good, it allows you to see beyond yourself. There are endless songs and poems about transcendent intimacy. A romantic experience gets you outside of yourself. Think about it. Sexual fantasies tend not to take place in a toxic landfill, aslum, or on the shores of a polluted lake. Each partner leads the other to somewhere better. The journey and destination are both compelling. In fantasies, we like to imagine ourselves in a better world, anew, and with someone special.
Good sex does not have to be a fantasy. To make it real, however, requires skill. It is deliberate. There is no room for laziness. Sex encumbered by disease and ill considered consequences are amateurish at best. If disease-free doesn’t work for you, you are doing it wrong. For sex to be profound, we need to move toward our potential. That means fewer unplanned pregnancies and more young women staying in school. It means better family planning which supports stable households and communities which, in turn, promotes economic development as well as better management of resources. Only then does the full fantasy envelop us in a crescendo of comfort and luxury.
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